unexpected.....

I should be used to unexpected turns.

Good or bad, that's what makes memories and stamps imprints in our Lives .

Like the collage of pictures above. Memories! Imprints!

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Well---------here is a good imprint to remember.........

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My dermatologist and I had a good long conversation this morning.

These bumps on my body are caused from a rare genetic disease called "Reeds syndrome"

and they can in some cases causes kidney tumors {cancer}

I will be flown to Maryland {Hi Jeri, I'm gunna come see you}

for 3 days where they will do tests on me......our tax dollars at work, this will not cost me a cent.

Reason being is cuz this is such a rare disease!

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Not that this news isn't bad enough......

I was informed they have to go back in for the THIRD time and take more out from my already

huge %$#@ incision.

REALLY? I think all the blood just flushed out of my face just now.....:)

GOOD NEWS?

He scheduled me with a plastic surgeon so I will be put out the third time around.

They will also take out two more bumps.....great!

Guess what that means? 4 WEEKS OF NO BATHS!!!

How will I survive my daily night time bubble bath with Dt Coke?

Such sacrafice I tell ya...........

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I need a sonic!

For everything thats Holy......

PLEASE CHARLEE SLEEP!!!

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Trying to work alot today.....kinda hard with this little girl of mine.

Filling dog food in my tupperware

Chalk all over my front door.

Braces elastics on every single toe and finger...comes to me with PURPLE FINGERS AND TOES.

YUP.....I swore. And freaked!

Yogurt on my carpet.

Cereal milk spilled on the floor

Changed her clothes 40 million times.

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Geez, I love her.

Ive decided not to ship her to china!

Todays heart.....

On those difficult days when the whole world gives you the cold shoulder, there are flowers lying in wait just below the surface. Sometimes it takes a lot of tears to thaw them enough to allow them to grow. It takes time, patience, resiliency, tenacity. Sometimes even then, it seems impossible.
HANG IN THERE. HOLD ON. Let your heart open up just one tiny crack and see what comes pouring in, or flooding out.

~kelly

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Todays heart:

Woke up today with a wonderful light flowing beat to my heart.

Changes are being made....and alot of them is by choice and alot is by feeling blessed to have such wonderful people in my life.

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Sometimes we are our OWN worse critic and it takes ALOT of courage to be content with where we are at.

Takes time, courage and a heart full of flutter.

:)

And sometimes its just having those around you to give you that tiny push you may need.....

and allow you to "Carry on"

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Today is a good day!

A very very good day!

{havent heard about my bump on my leg yet---I will share as soon as I know....in the mean time...I bought new shoes. makes it all better!}

walk in my shoes!

These pictures make me cry.

I know where I was at in every single one.

Where I was going, What I was wearing and what emotion took place.

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I have walked in my shoes.

Have you?

Bigger holes and randomness of life.......

Im not as good to take my mark with me everywhere like I use too.

{Mark is my camera's name}

Im sure mark feels neglected lately.

But My cell phone is much more convient then mark.

Mark......i still love you and think you have a sexy body. ;) lol

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So here is some randomeness pictures from my phone.

Here I am at the Dermie.....{Dr. Jason Hadley} FANTASTIC! he is a friend of some mutual friends And I adore him.

The nurse who helped out cut more CHUNK out of my legs.....left me a message on my blog a few days ago.

then she saw me and says......your Annie? You have a blog?

I just left a message saying how I found your blog...

SMALL WORLD PEOPLE!

So after I pulled myself together from a 2 inch incision and 1/2 inch deep and another few stiches on the other leg......we had to get a picture. :)

Hi melissa. :)

Ya-----I didn't do well.
glad I had the girls and other good company to help me!

:(
So we will see what the tests say in a few days!
then I will just have someone knock me out to get the rest out.......mmmkay?

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Other good news....
My friend Marissa had her sweet baby boy...."Baby J"
I love him. and i love her.
She had a rough delivery.....good work mama!!

We took off to Idaho for 5 days.

I took the girls.

The girls needed mommy bonding time......

I took these pictures as the boats got ready early as 6:30 a.m to begin the Bow Fishing tournament, waiting for the horn to blow.
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As I edited these two pictures
I had a sweet thought.
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This trip with my daughters was a new beginning for all of us....

we made some changes and set some goals.

Like the morning.......

the sun ALWAYS comes up.

and we ALWAYS have the chance to begin again........try again.......

Picture of my owies.

you can also see my bandaid with the other stiches on the other leg.....

call me gimp.

:)

I got a hole......

Sometimes when you are unsure about decisions the ONLY thing we have to rely on is HOPE!

And HOPE takes Patience. Damn patience! I hate that word......)

But have learned to keep calm and carry on and then HOPE it all turns out ok!

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Last week I had a a small sore deep rooted bump cut out of my leg.

I have 4 other ones on my body...

But this one he cut out and then did some tests on it.

Well, I got the phone call today they they don't feel good about it and its growing and the cells are splitting and i was told to come back in and they will actually cut deeper and wider.

{hole now is double the size of a pencil eraser}

ewe.

Not excited being that I crawled up the table and almost hyperventilated last time.

and now being told it will take him about 30 minutes to do this.

FOR ONE!

looks like I will be getting them all out.

can they just KNOCK ME OUT? someone.....please?

:(

Me and My girls will continue to bloom together!

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I'm one worried mom.

Teenagers ARE hard!

fun, exciting, silly, goofy, stressful, many sleepless nights, many tears,

AGAIN.......

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hope.

dreams.....

{wow, two blogs in a day? lucky...}

Wishing and dreaming is more then just throwing in a penny in a wishing well!

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I love this picture of charlee takin last night as the sun begun to set..

The innocence of a child sometimes still plays a factor when your older....

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Keep wishing.

Keep dreaming.

Begin again.....

Its been almost 3 months of non exsistant blogging.....

I didn't die.....but a part of my life did.

So im strugging finding my place.......

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I miss my DAILY blogging routine every morning.

and I know you do too....

I have the emails that tell me!

All of you that know Annie....Know, that blogging and journaling is my salvation and therapy.

so.......here we go......pushing my way through.

carry on........

Here we go with WEST updates:

Me: Busy, overwhlemed, distracted but still smiling!

went to Lake powell and met everlasting friends.

Went to a bow fishing tournament, been boating out on the lake alot!

Sister dates, going out to dinner, and plays...

bear lake for our annual 14 years and counting couzins kamp!

{pictures to come as well}

dad dont kill me.....

and then just playing mom!

Its been a new adventure forsure!

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Abbie: she is almost 15....what more ya want me to say?

I spend alot of time keeping my eye in the back of my head on her!

{pictures coming soon}

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Autumn: She is my rock.

And is into animals more then ever! just got a new kitty for her, and yesterday it got out and we can't find her......so many tears at the west house today!

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Jax: Just got the coolest new hair cut {picture soon}

little rocker!

he is enjoying NO SCHOOL!

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Charlee: she is 100% fully potty trained.
bout TIME!!! and......still cute and ever so naughty. :)

This was taken before my sisters night out!

A MEMORY thats inprinted in my mind for life!

This is Autumns kitty........who is lost.......hope we find her!

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Promises:

I promise myself I will use tools I have around me to heal my heart.

including this blog. :)

The end.........